Settling for Less: How to Claim Your Worth and Build Healthy, Reciprocated Relationships

As a therapist, I’ve worked with individuals who are constantly giving their energy to relationships that don’t honor them—relationships where they feel invisible or like they’re always proving their worth. You give, you care, you show up—but sometimes, the people you invest in don’t appreciate you the way you deserve. It’s time to stop settling for scraps and start claiming the seat at the table you truly deserve.

It’s easy to get caught up in the belief that we need to earn love or fight for a place in someone’s life. But here’s the truth: You are enough, just as you are. Your worth is not up for debate. You don’t have to shrink yourself to make others feel comfortable, and you don’t have to tolerate relationships that drain you. Let’s dive into how you can start stepping into your power and build relationships that truly honor you.

1. Know Your Worth and Stand in It

So many of us grow up feeling like we have to prove ourselves just to be seen. But here’s the truth: You don’t have to prove anything. You’ve been through too much to allow anyone to treat you like you’re less than what you are. When you start to recognize your value and stand firm in it, others will have no choice but to see it too.

2. Set Boundaries Like a Boss

Too often, we let our boundaries slide because we’re afraid of being labeled difficult or unlovable. But I want you to know: You are not difficult for demanding respect. Setting boundaries is not only a sign of self-love, it’s a way to protect your peace. You are worthy of spaces where your energy is honored, not drained. When you teach others how to treat you, you create room for relationships that are supportive and healthy.

3. Know That You Are Worthy

There’s a difference between wanting to be appreciated and seeking validation. You don’t need anyone’s approval to know that you’re worthy. We’ve been taught in so many ways to seek external validation, but that only leaves us feeling empty and unfulfilled. True validation comes from within. When you start giving yourself the love and respect you deserve, you won’t need to chase it from anyone else.

4. Surround Yourself with People Who Value You

You are not here to chase love or support from people who can’t give it back. There are people out there who will pour into you the same way you pour into them, who will celebrate you, who will lift you up instead of drain you. You deserve those people, and it’s time to make space for them.

5. Know that You Are Deserving of Healthy Relationships

It’s hard, I know. Especially when you’ve been hurt by rejection or abandonment. You might feel like you’re not supposed to walk away, like you have to settle. But let me tell you: You don’t have to fight for love. The right relationships should feel mutual and fulfilling. You shouldn’t have to beg for appreciation, support, or basic respect.

6. Acknowledge That You Are Enough, Even If Others Don’t

One of the hardest things to accept is when people don’t show up the way we expect or need them to. It can feel like a personal rejection, but the truth is: Their failure to appreciate you has nothing to do with your worth. Some people are simply incapable of acknowledging your greatness, but that’s their problem, not yours. You don’t need to wait for anyone’s approval to know that you are worthy.

7. Make Room for Healthy, Loving Relationships

Now that you’ve started to set boundaries, build your self-worth, and surround yourself with people who value you, it’s time to make space for the relationships you’ve always deserved. Healthy, loving, and reciprocal connections don’t just happen—they require intention and effort. By creating space for these types of relationships, you’re opening up the opportunity to receive the love and care you’ve been giving out all along.

So, if you’re reading this and feeling like it’s time to make a change, remember: You are enough, just as you are. You don’t have to earn love, approval, or respect. You are worthy of it, and it’s time to start accepting nothing less.

If you’re ready to explore how attachment wounds may be impacting your relationships, or if you want support in building a healthier relationship with yourself first—then with others—feel free to schedule a consultation. Together, we can start healing and create the loving, reciprocal connections you deserve.